plantshit

I'm nothing , if not a human , that’s all I know, sometimes I question myself on and on what I am, but I never come up with answers for my questions. I'm different that’s no doubt about that now, I see what others cannot , I do and think like no one else. I prowls the world , unique in my own way , living amongst those who all seems as strangers for me.

I remember my first day in life completely, it was complete darkness and suddenly in a blink of an eye, I could see ,hear and do what I can do now. I was standing on a playground outside my kindergarten building ,which for the moment I didn't know , I did know nothing and I was just stunned and alive, it took some seconds before in a blink of eye all this knowledge flashed by in my mind, I could talk , I knew names, I knew where I was. In an instant again I was giving the unique abilities to be a child, the childish behaviour ,the fun , the adventures and curiosity of living and learning. The years passed quick when you are a happy child and so it did for me ....

On a dark night in the forest I run into a black mysterious figure and all that I ever knew was going to change, it was tall and dark, like it was made of pure darkness . It devoured me with its presence, its felt exactly like the first day in my life. The world stood still, quite and dark ,I don't know completely what happened but I ran away shortly afterwards. I ran as I have never done before, home and crawled under the bed. I was confused and not afraid like I thought I was, I didn't know why I ran away and I felt a strong attraction to get back. I slept deep that night like it had never happened ,and the next morning I didn't care about it anymore, it was like it had never happened, I just couldn’t care and life went on like before.

The years passed like minutes and I was thinking about my past now, I wasn't a child anymore even if I looked like one: I always felt like I was watched, but every time I looked around there was nothing, I felt I was more different from others, it seem like the world stood still and I was the only one that changed, people were detached and predictable. I couldn't stand being different and not knowing why and how. I begin to search for answers...

I remember the days in church when I asked out the priests on church lessons about god and the meaning of it all. Always I was giving the same answer that I couldn't accept . "god works in mysterious ways and gives his signs of existence in his owns ways and etcetra" . I visited the place I had met this dark figure, but there was nothing , not even signs. So out of boredom and without hope of finding the answers I gave up the search.....

End part one